Get off the see saw

A close friend, divorced after 20 years of marriage to a completely self absorbed and self serving idiot, recently reconnected with a high school friend and began what looked to be a promising courtship. Rusty on dating etiquette and a bit daunted to "get back into the game after years in the penalty box" as she so aptly put it, nevertheless she took a deep breath and jumped into the proverbial dating pool. Unfortunately she did not use her head while diving back into romance, and thus perhaps maneuver intellectually, stepping slowly and considering her periphery, distance, rate of acceleration and velocity needed to make a safe water landing (trust she did not have a seat back to use as a flotation device). However as most novices manuevering impulsively from the heart, she performed an awkward, gangly jump, all legs and ankles and torso, with minimal direction and maximum thrust, resulting in a painful belly flop that bruised both abdomen and heart. After three wonderful first dates with this friend from her past, giddy with renewed feelings of attraction and infatuation, she fell into the requisite school girl mindset that "he could be the one" and began foolishly planning the possibility of their new life in her head. Prior to the fourth date she received a fateful phone call from said romeo basically informing her that while he "cared for her immensely" there was another he had been dating prior to her who decided that she wanted to "try again" and he felt inclined to invest his time and attention there due to lingering feelings. Devastated, I comforted my friend while reminding her that life offers no guarantees, and three dates does not a promise nor obligation make. And while I initially respected this guy for his honesty and what seemed to be an attempt at prevention of hurt on behalf of my friend, respect turned to suspicion and disgust quite quickly. I became a reluctant observer of the pull me, push me game men and woman play when they feel unsure of romantic inclinations and try to pursue multiple options before settling on the right candidate. And this guy was attempting to play my friend this same way. Dating multiple people can be healthy and interesting, if done with honest, open communication of expectation and intent. Everyone has the right to take every opportunity to decide what is best for them. But not the expense of someone else.
However, this guy decided to end things with my friend, and then email her two days later telling her he "could not stop thinking about her." Following my advice, she did not respond to his email. This was followed by an emotional phone call, where he informed her he was miserable, missed her and felt he had made the wrong decision, and that she may be the one. She said he was nearly "in tears". At this point my ire grew to great proportions, as I saw my friend being navigated unwillingly down the vasilating path of indecisiveness written by someone who wants to have his cake and eat it too. Taking advantage of a vulnerable person by playing upon her feelings and insecurity. The last advice I gave to my friend was that she was a worthwhile, wonderful person, worthy of someone's 100% time and attention, and if this guy truly cared for her he would give her said time and consideration which she so aptly deserved. And while this situation is still in limbo, it brings to mind past dating situations where I was on the see saw, and like the up and down manipulation, my heart would reel from someone's attention, and then plummet with that same individual's indecisiveness and distance. Regaining control in this situation is tantamount to peace of mind, and taking a final step and separating from the person pulling you forward and pushing you back, adding confusion and doubt to an already challenged self esteem provides great release. If somebody wants you and loves you, there is not much that can be done to prevent said singular pursuit. And ultimately people treat you as badly as you let them. I want my friend's first dating experience, though painful, to have a positive outcome in that she learns to walk away from a potentially destructive situation, to get off the proverbial see- saw and take the straight shot down the slide and away from this manipulation. I don't know what the outcome will be, I just know I will be her safe water landing no matter how it turns out.