You have to let love happen..

My life is navigated by subscribing to the ever reliable type “A” adage of “making things happen” vs. “letting things happen” naturally. A natural born “doer”, my self described impatient and compulsive nature propels me to constantly think ahead, considering all angles, proactively planning every minute detail to control a rapid start, maintain a furious and relentless momentum, with a predetermined and ultimately successful end result. This formula has proved wildly successful in my career, but as they say “not so much” in my personal life, related to dating. I would never presume to dictate another’s outcome, but perhaps would lend this perspective gleaned from a trial and error formula chock full of “Lessons Learned”. Unfortunately for me, the strongest and harshest lessons have been learned from following my impulses vs. practicing restraint, and those mistakes resulted from turning a deaf ear to those exponentially wiser individuals whom have advised me countless times regarding matters of the heart. “You have to let love happen”.
I don’t like to let “anything” happen. I am the one pacing the floor, making furious plans in my head while surrounded by patient souls neither plotting nor planning the next move, rather letting things “be” until the dust settles and the chips have fallen where they may.
And having spent years since my divorce, mowing impatiently through relationships, either letting go of individuals who’s relationship pace I considered too slow, or myself being “let go” for trying to manipulate and control said pace to my liking, over the last year I at last came to the frustrating and semi painful realization that while I may choose to live my life at this relentless pace, the individual with whom I am spending my time should feel blessedly free to maintain the pace of his choosing. If it is the right time, the right place, and the right moment, the velocity shall either propel or relent, allowing us to meet peacefully in the middle.
If you have to make it happen with contrived circumstances, excuses or manipulation, you will control your outcome to ultimately no outcome, and thus the continued solidarity.
Rather if you live your life, make your own plans, without trying to force the circumstances or actions of another to serve your ultimate outcome, I firmly believe that relationship and love you desire will come to you naturally. It requires a sturdy faith, a massive amount of patience, and the art of not acting on every impulse to “make something happen”. As for myself, with regard to love, now when things aren’t going as I like or as I have planned, I slow down, take a deep breath and practice the painful art of doing absolutely nothing, for I know in my heart that things shall happen as they should. And so far it has worked out rather well for me.