Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Words manifest

The world seems embalmed in gray, wistful anticipation for fickle nature to relinquish her water and drench an already soddened earth
And I, plan not for what words shall come forth from heart to mind to prose
And I think not of what I will create,
but with open mind and heart, like mother earth I wait
Words as well can fall like rain
Form easily from clouded thought to manifest in a down pour of emotion and content
Till the hands cannot keep pace with the magnitude, (though once trace) of effort spent
I cannot provide intent or source of prose
For what provided inspiration to my story true
I can only hope that what was wrought
Whether sadness, fear, laughter or pain
Did ultimately touch you

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

if I should die before I wake

In a prayer to our father, those fateful words “if I should die before I wake” never rang so true for me.

Armed with your love my heart is strong, my life one of solidarity.

If I should die tomorrow it would occur with no regret, for did I know the rapture of love everlasting, to feel part of a unique partnership that sealed the gaping hole in my life with passion, allegiance and true honesty.

To have lived a life surrounded, yet so alone. To never know the sweetness of someone other than my mother wondering and worrying about me..Until there was you-longing for me, desperate for my safety and desiring of my happiness over yours. To look at my many neurosis with a quizzical smile, to never cast judgement over my countless sins though it would be justified if your condemnation chosen, to put a vibrant life on hold if mine were pensive or pending, to cry ancillary tears in honor of my own, to feel a strong sense of accomplishment over my triumphs, to experience physical pain over my own torture, and to assume the responsibility of bearing my burdens and problems without a second thought, now you see why this is not a morbid thought but rather a joyful platitude, that if I were to die tomorrow that I have known true love and completion through you.