fall before you fly-to my dearest husband

I longed for wings, I longed for things, emblazoned fear from denial so wrought, until all excuses did so diminish what was a heart once bold, my inspirtation cold, until the only words I could utter, hopeless
In my stationary limbo, twas easier to declare that my wings refused to sprout, the proverbial skin stayed smooth and unblemished save for the red dryness where I picked and poked and prodded searching for the smallest sign, a random feather, broken skin with smallest growth, and yet there remained no indication just endless miles of smooth dermis
I longed for bumpy uneven surface, prelude to gorgeous, sparking wings that weighed my shoulders down and extended beyond my mortal shouders, to serve as a brilliant canopy to catch the wind and divert for flight, the smoothest down cloak to shelter me from gusts of wind that whoosh and whirl while one rides the chariot of the night sky, wings to rival the ancient gods or the equivalent of the archangels' own
and still the days passed and there remained no sign
until the day you tired of my hoping and vaulted me over the cliff into the sun, you always told me I had to fall before I flew but I always thought you were talking in the blessed proverbial. In truth you had grown weary of my waitng for greater things and blessed, cursed man did you take matters into your own to goad my dreams to reality
and as I plummeted to earth and cursed your name for you had turned away, my security had abandoned me, my longing to live, to survive and become more of what I knew I was consumed me, the basest instinctive will to live and not become one with hardest ground,
for the earth that circled close looked brutal and unwelcoming, a nasty grave while the wind beckoned, it soothed my trembling skin and spoke of lightness with clarity
the second before my fate was sealed, my back it arched, my skin erupted and the canopy of light and gold that transformed my heart from weak to bold, the canopy enveloped, the angel's wings sprouted and saved me from my oblivion,
as I began to soar above the earth, velocity and direction diminished as I rode each gust highter, above the canyon, above the earth to my destiny, dreams manifest to accept no less than your own greatness, to never wait and long and wonder for that which you can MAKE HAPPEN NOW
and as I scanned the horizon line, I saw the smallest speck, of life, zooming closer twas you looking up with arms outstretched, to catch me just in case I should fall
my anger fled I smiled instead for I did need you after all